I know it's been a while, but I have been preoccupied with repairing the damage of the damned Swiss.
Just when I thought it was safe to be a Swiss-American, Ben Roethlisberger goes and molests a woman, again.
Damn it, Ben, some of us are still living with the stigma of the Grimm-Hoffmann Affair, WWII Nazi banking, fruity panted dudes guarding the Pope's digs, and Renee Zelleweger. 
Now we got this jackass to deal with. I tell, ya, folks, the Germans, Japanese, Americans, and French got it easy. This joker's antics have made the Swiss the most hated people on earth. Thank God we've still got those little red knives everyone needs.
By the way, speaking of the Pope guys, as soon as I'm not employed by the Catholics, it's time for a papal/boy haiku.
Now give the Seahawks their 2006 superbowl rings, goddammit.
HAIKU...
Big Ben, a true gem,
Has been getting fan mail and
Thank you's from Kobe.
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