La Flaca and I spent a very pleasant evening thru early morning at the excellent beach hotel/resturant/bar/disco/surfing HJ Pradomar in Puerto Colombia this weekend, celebrating my pal Henry's video release party. It seems our industrious, Jerseyite, black-belt buddy has just become the Billy Blanks of the Spanish-speaking world with the release of his exercise DVDs. Henry premiered his infomercial at the party and we all drank toasts to the art of teaching people to kick others in the interest of healthier living.
All jocularity aside, the event was great and Henry, after working like a coal-miner (meaning "really hard", not "with a little lamp on his head") on this project for four years was absolutely ecstatic. Anyway, we ate good, we drank good, we (well everybody but me) danced good, and we got home at 4 am good. So I got's Xmas presents for everyone all reserved for next year, with which you will lose the fat and learn to kick people in Spanish, what could be better?
Here's a quiz for yaWhat happens if Hollywood hack director Brett Ratner were to eat the entire Moonlighting DVD collection, The Last Boyscout, Catwoman, and 50% of the video store's "Suspense" aisle, where movies with titles like Illict Dreams and Night of Fear with stars like Shannon Tweed and Richard Tyson?He probably gets a little ill and might just toss his cookies. If he happens to toss them onto 35mm celluloid, you get the unbearably bad PERFECT STRANGER, which is the worst movie I have seen since The Holiday.I admit to watching both these pieces of shit, and I have excuses for both.
I find it amazing though, what famous, rich actory folks are prepared to do for money. I can understand me making this movie; I'm poor. But shit, Bruce, wow, this is worse than either Blind Date or The Return of Bruno. Hudson Hawk is Ben Hur compared to this gargantuan pile of duck feces. I think Mr. Willis should take his $ from Perfect Stranger and put a few more dudes on the "Bruce's most wanted list" starting with director James Foley.
I won't even mention Halle Berry, as this movie seems right about up her alley.
Happy Easter.Not too much to report this break.La flaca and I went to Cartagena after finding a hotel at the last possible moment, which means a couple things:A. I got gouged. I do not want to admit how much I paid for the two nights at this hotel, but let's just say there are better deals to be had even during the high season.B. The hotel wasn't the best. It was however, an all-inclusive deal, which means the food is on them. And it tasted as though it had been on them, especially on Pedro, the guy who cleans the bathrooms. I don't even want to write the name of the hotel, it was such an overpriced shithole.
anyway, it was a nice trip, we went to the inquisition torture museum, which didn't cost hardly anything but was way overpriced. I had a nice time, but am a little embarrassed to say that the only thing I feel I accomplished on this trip was the turning of my skin to a very very bright neon pink color.I have been out of the sun for a while, and after a couple hours in the sun on the beach in cartagena (prepositional phrases for all) I became a new color. It still hurts. And by this I don't mean that it hurts when someone slaps me on the back and says, "Nice work closing the Hertvinschtinker deal, Guy." But it hurts when the earth revolves around the sun. It hurts when my small intestines squeeze old food matter. It hurts all the time.Oh, it rained today. I know this seems like the most mundane of all mundanities, but people who have eeked out a living in BQ, will understand why I make this observation. Today was the first time it has rained at all since late November.So stay dry, keep away from the arroyos and eat your eggs.Fpp
