How much "liking" that gets from FppI: .005%. We do not care about golf. We do not care about golfers. It's a boring frustrating game for fat, rich old men.
2. He's a complete corporate whore, shilling everything from Buicks to Nike feces to Anal Lube.
How much "liking" that gets from FppI: .00000001%. He's a class-A douchebag.
Consensus: Fuck Tiger Woods.
Now however, Tiger has become a more, shall we say, interesting character on the world stage. There are now things about him to be liked. For example:
1. From now on when you have a smash up with your rig, you can tell the cops when you'll be willing to talk to them. "Yeah, sure, officer, I would love to come down to the station, but I am playing with my Wii. I'll come along in three or four days with my lawyer to explain why I drunkenly smashed into that Dunkin Doughnuts." Thank you, Tiger. You have established a great president there. I will deal with the authorities now only on my own terms. Awesome.
How much "liking" that gets from FppI: 22%. We can all be Tiger, we can all tell the cops to get bent while we figure out some bullshit exit strategy.
2. Mr. Wholesome Disneyland Gosh and Heck gets to bang cocktail waitresses all over the free world. There's nothing wholesome about me. I get to do some really crazy sick shit with goats and midget trapeze artists from the former Soviet Union
How much "liking" that gets from FppI: 44%. We don't have to worry about anything anymore, not any morality or religious/socially instilled ideas of respect or decency. We get to do whatever the fuck we want as long as we can afford it. Which for the editors at FppInternational means watching Cinemax after 11:45 pm.
Tiger is now up there with Dick Butkus, Lawrence Taylor and Lou Pineda. He's on the fast track to becoming a decent guy.
So, when Tiger was leaving Australia (no doubt after a liason with a Kangaroo cocktail waitress), he was talking about how great his life was and all that. Then, a scant few days later, he's deeply sorry and needs time to consider his actions. SUCH BULLSHIT. He's only sorry he got caught. And got caught like such an asshole too. I hope his wife really beat the crap out of him.
BTW. This Taiwanese thing is awesome beyond description.
HAIKU:
I am rich and known.
I do anyfuckingthing.
Swedish chicks are tough.
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